Archive for August, 2012

Letter To A Guy Who Had More Luck Than Me

August 5, 2012 Leave a comment

Hey, man,

I’m not gonna ask you how’s going or how was your day. Actually, I don’t even care. We don’t know each other but most likely we’ll meet soon, and I hope I’ll have the chance to talk to you about all this. Anyway, I wanna tell you a story, and you play a role in it..

You’ve recently met a girl whom I know for more than a year. And I love her for more than a year… You know, she’s a kind of person who’s always in the center of what is going on. And that’s really great. She has some power to make all the guys around her fall in love with her. I don’t know if she does it on purpose or accidentally, but that’s the fact. And as you probably understood, I’m not an exception.

But I think, I was different somehow. She never cared for the other guys who loved, liked and wanted her. But about me she did. She really felt for me. I’m not imagining. That’s what she said… But everything was quite complicated at the moment.

When we met each other her BF had just left for the army. Actually, I had met her before that, but we almost never talked to each other. But soon we started seeing each other more often, and we had fun together, we chatted till the early hours throughout the night. And we… I wouldn’t say fell in love ’cause I’m afraid to say so… felt something for each other. And when I told her what I felt she said one thing I will never forget. She said: “It could have been you had I no BF, but I love him and I will never let him down!”

I’m a strong person but I cried that night like I never had before – bitter and silent. If she had told me that she didn’t care for me, that I was just a friend for her, I might have accepted it that way, but what she said hurt me painfully. Though I was proud of her for her loyalty. And we became almost best friends. We shared our joy and sadness, our success and failure, we got drunk together more than a million times. And we never spoke about what we felt long ago… Until you appeared in her life…

When she told me about you and about what you changed in her, it cracked open my old wounds. Yeah, I know you never meant to hurt anyone, and you even have no idea about what’s going on. You just do what you have to. But I’ll tell you just one thing. You were just lucky. Trust me. You appeared in the right place and, what’s more important, in the right time… Because at the moment she started forgetting her soldier.

Now imagine how painful it is for me to know that all I dreamed about, all I wanted in my life was just a matter of time, and I lost my chance just because I met her at the peak of her another romance which at that time seemed to be endless.

And all I can tell you now is that I don’t hate you. No, man. You did and do everything right, unfortunately for me. Maybe I’m jealous, I’m not sure as I can’t describe all I feel. But still I don’t hate you. I told you all this to ease my pain somehow. And you know what? It helped. So if something like this happens in your life too, I’m ready to listen.

P.S. L’amour fait les plus grandes douceurs et les plus sensibles infortunes de la vie. (Madeleine de Scudery)

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